Conversation in Philadelphia
Deb is crossing a street in Philadelphia. A Random approaches Deb.
Random: Excuse me, do you know where Something Street is?
Deb: Oh, I’m sorry. I’m not from this city, I’m from the city.
Conversation with a Philadelphia Cab Driver
Deb and her married friends are in a cab in Philadelphia. They arrive at their destination. Husband begins payment process.
Husband: I’m going to be using my card.
Cab Driver: Come on, man. You don’t gots the cash?
Husband: Sorry, it’s all I have. It’s a card or nothing.
Cab Driver: It’s only eight dollars, man. You gots to got the cash.
Husband: Well, it’s ten dollars with tip and no, I don’t “gots the cash”.
Wife: This guy’s a jerk. Don’t tip him.
Cab Driver: Yeah, don’t tip me, man. Give those two dollars to your whore.
Husband and Wife get out while Deb remains sitting in the back.
Deb: Sir, I just wanted to let you know that I thoroughly enjoyed this cab ride. You are an extremely pleasant person and I wish you nothing but the best.
Wife & Husband/Cab Driver: Get out of the cab, Deb./Get the f*ck out of my cab.
Conversation While Working as an Agent's Assistant
Deb is an assistant to a tv literary agent. Male Client is visiting. Male Client asks Deb to get his friend, who is also a client, on the phone while agent is not in his office. He closes office door. Deb connects them and remains on the line.
Male Client # 1: Hey, Male Client # 2.
Male Client # 2: Dude, what do you want?
MC # 1: I thought you’d want to know that I’m calling from our agent’s office.
MC # 2: So?
MC #1: So think about it.
MC # 2: Dude, did you get to see Deb?
MC # 1: Yeah.
MC # 2: Dude, like, in person?
MC # 1: Yeah. Get this - I had her dial you.
MC # 2: Dude, you had her dial? You are the man. What does she look like?
MC # 1: Exactly how we thought.
MC # 2: Oh man. Dude, I knew it. I’m so coming to visit Agent. Does she have big, round…
Male Client # 1 opens door and approaches Deb.
MC # 1: Hey, Deb. I’m so sorry to do this but I think I got disconnected. Can you get him back for me?
Deb: Oh, you got disconnected? That’s so strange. No problem. Hopefully that doesn’t happen again.
Deb connects them and remains on the line.
MC # 1: You have to get a new cell phone. It’s always dropping calls.
MC # 2: Dude, I’m on my land line.
MC # 1: Wait a second…
Conversation with a Waitress in Philadelphia
Deb and Friend are dining at Zahav in Philadelphia. They decide to order port.
Friend: Waitress, can you tell me what the difference is between the 2001 port and the 10 year old port you have listed on your menu?
Waitress: I don’t but I will go ask.
Waitress leaves for a moment and then comes back to table with the answer.
Waitress: The 10 year old port is older.
Conversation at a Hospital
Deb and family are in the waiting room at the hospital. Mother is on phone.
Deb and Brother sit together chatting.
Mother: Uh oh.
Deb and Brother jump up with alarm.
Brother: What?
Mother doesn’t say anything and remains on the phone. Her face, distressed.
Deb: Mother, what?
Mother hangs up phone. She shakes her head slowly.
She takes a deep breath.
Mother: They’re sealing all the driveways at our community tomorrow.
Conversation in Graduate School
Deb is in class. The Professor lectures about Freud. He uses dating relationships as an example so the class can understand.
Professor: …so the reason you get angry with a guy, and if you want to express yourself correctly to him you could say, ”You are not treating and fufilling me the way my mother did as an infant and I need you to do that”. Of-course, I advise you not to tell him this since it will automatically ruin any chance with him. Any questions?
Every female student’s hand in class shoots up.
Professor: …about Freud. Not your love lives.
Every female student’s hand in class drops down.
Professor: Moving on.
Conversation at a Bar
Deb is at a bar on a Saturday night. A Random Drunk is apologizing for spilling his beer on Deb as she gets the signal from a friend that it is time to go. To confirm, she calls out to friend.
Deb: We’re leaving?
Random Drunk: Cool. I’m just going to let my dudes know.
Deb: What?
Random Drunk: Sorry, let me just tell my friends that we’re leaving.
Deb: What are you talking about?
Random Drunk: You just said “we’re leaving”.
Deb: Oh, sorry. My friends and I are leaving. I don’t know what you’re doing.
Conversation with a NYC Cab Driver
It is Saturday night. Deb crosses East 17th St. and Irving Place. She only looks one way and a cab almost hits her. Cab Driver barks at Deb.
Cab Driver: What are you stupid?
Deb barks back.
Deb: Sometimes.
Conversation on the Walk to Work
Deb is on her way to work. She is about to walk by a Grocery Store but the sidewalk is blocked by cartons from the morning food shipment. Random Employee tries to clear the way.
Random Employee: Sorry about this-a. You’ll be able to pass-a in a moment.
Deb: Don’t worry, I’m in no rush. Just on my way to work.
Random Employee slams box on the pavement.
Random Employee: I told ya it will be cleared-a in a moment. I can only move-a so fast.
Deb: Please, take your time.
Random Employee grows more and more annoyed with Deb.
Random Employee: No need-a for your attitude. I’m just doing-a my job.
Deb: I don’t have an attitude. I’m totally fine with this.
Random Employee: You sarcastic Murray Hill girls-a are all-a the same.
Deb: Ugh. I do not live in Murray Hill.
Conversation with Doorman
Deb walks by her Doorman with a cup of ice cream in hand. Doorman shakes his head.
Doorman: Too much icecream.
Deb: What?
Doorman:You need to stop with the ice cream, Deb.
Deb:I don’t eat that much ice cream.
Doorman: You do. And you know what? You need to stop before it’s too late.
